Friday, June 29, 2018

Ages of Love


A much brighter and more cheerful poem for today's entry. Hope you will all enjoy reading.

Ages of Love

To dream the dreams of a thousand years and fall in love as many have before me
The same story playing out time and time again, each time with a new twist
Each time the love is the same, yet each time the love is so very different
The love I feel, is the same love felt thousands of years before I discovered love
The same as that love the wandering nomad felt when in search of a mate
The same love desired by the noble knight, fighting for the appreciation of a fair lady
As the sailor, sailing home to see his fair maiden; who is awaiting his return
As the soldier, fighting to protect his wife and children from harms dreadful grasp
Love has connected all these ages, though thousands of years have gone by
As love has connected so many hearts, though the hearts are miles apart
Love strikes at the heart and soul of the world, knocking down all defenses
An unstoppable force that no one, nor anything can protect against or destroy
But something so beautiful and so divine as love, should not be obstructed
The look in their eyes, the smile on their faces, the tender touch of a loving hand
The passionate kiss and the delicate, loving embrace of protecting arms
What better dream can anyone hope for, then to dream of an unconditional love?
For thousands of years love has been dreamed of, by every heart and soul
Some find it; some do not, but those who do…                
               
                                                                  Set the stage for another thousand years


Thank you for reading! Hope it was to your liking. Let me know in the comments below. 

Thursday, June 28, 2018

After the Party


I apologize this is a very dark poem today. Originally this poem was written for a book I was writing, from the perspective of the main character in the novel. The main character has been abused and writes from that experience. The book has been in the works for a while, it has been a tough one, that I have stopped writing at many points. Who knows, I may never finish it, but I figured I would share a poem from that novel, which I have named, Insignificant Voices. 

After the Party
Doorbell rings and in they come. Parents welcome all who show
Out come the drinks for one and all. Laughing. Drinking. Smoking
House begins to reek. I hate this place with all my heart, stinking house
Desperate for them all to leave, put a bitter end to this night unending
Get the stings out of the way, blows rain down like blood after a battle
Music so loud, pounding but I don’t mind. Music drowns out the voices
Voices I hate. Voices I despise. Murmuring incessantly like cicadas  
Cops crash the party. Angry neighbor made a noise complaint
Could they not have come earlier? My night can finally be over
Gone, gone at last. Gone except for the two whom I hate most
Why couldn’t they be drunk enough to forget where they live?
I wish they’d go away with all their stinking drunk and stumbling friends
They order me to clean up their mess; I knew they would, as always
Every party is much the same, that’s how I know what’s to come
Shivers run down my spine, someone stepping on my welcoming grave
A tear burns bitterly down my cheek, but the worst is yet to come
Mom has passed out gracefully on the couch, that’s one less for later
Dad stumbles drunkenly towards me, fearfully cringing in anticipation
The first slap. I don’t move. My head spins, my head hurts, blasted
Second slap, my nose bleeds. A flood of crimson red anger rising up
Hatred courses bitterly through my veins, darkening the world around
A punch; right in my gut. Laughing drunkenly as I throw up, jerk
Another punch blackens my eye. Each week gets worse and worse
One last punch. I fall down and he laughs harder. I hate him more
He kicks me now and I cry, unable to contain it any longer, unbearable
Falling down, he passes out. For him the day is over, memory wiped clean
A broken rib, a bloody nose, a blackened eye, a split lip, damage surveyed
What kind of lowlife trash does this to his son? Not worth the air he breathes
Every week is much the same. Next week will be a little worse
A tornado of anger and hate billows destructively inside me, full of ash
The devil’s fire burned into my soul. Devil, laying there, grinning, asleep
I can still barely breathe, gasping through stabs, jerking with the effort
That snake winded me, I want to kill this piece of trash when I catch my breath
I want to rid my world of this venomous snake who should love me
Breathe, breathe, I wish but the ragged breaths are becoming more difficult
Seeing two of him, great, just what I always wanted. Merry frigging Christmas!
I feel so sick; my head is spinning like a top and hurts, no, throbs so bad
I smell my vomit beneath me and alcohol from this drunk’s clothes
Why can’t I breathe?!
Darn it, what’s wrong with me?!
Get up!
He’s really done it this time! Hurts worse than any other time before
Not that he cares, he’s going to love this when he wakes up
Heck he’ll love it so much, he’ll want to do it again, a reason to drink
Not that he needs a reason for that. Any excuse is a good one
Can’t breathe. Coughing. Blood foamed lips. That can’t be good
Why can’t I have an end to these beatings?
I feel so darn dizzy!
Why do I feel so dizzy?!
Oh so…
              Dizzy
                       Almost
                                   Like
                                           I’m
                                                 Drowning…
 

Thank you for reading, I promise the next poem I post will be a lot more cheery. Would love to hear some feedback!

Tuesday, June 26, 2018

Windows: A Look To the Past


A freshly written poem, hot off the press. Difficult to write, but think I finally got it right. A glimpse into my past. Again nothing aimed at causing hard feelings or casting blame. I have dealt with the past, and this is just my brain's way of processing. 

Windows
Look in the window, what do I see?
I see a baby, crying out for some love
Mother there in body, but nothing more
Too depressed to notice the needs of a child

Look in the window, what do I see?
Father struggling, raising kids on his own
Marries again, hoping to find truer love
Mother not there, trapped in a cycle of men

Look in the window, what do I see?
Child gets molested, forced to do what is wrong
Parents in shock, not sure what to do
Lost and ashamed, never speak of the pain

Look away from the window, too much to bear
To much depression, a child so confused
Unsure how to handle the thoughts in his head
This can’t be normal, feeling so alone

Look in the mirror, what do I see?
The same little child, keeping people away
Let no one near, afraid they might see
The monster inside me, the one that I see



Thanks for reading! Feel free to comment and let me know your thoughts. Remember if you use this poem, I would appreciate you asking. If you share it, please give credit where credit is due. 

Thursday, June 21, 2018

ABC's For God


Here is another poem that I wrote years ago. Kind of fun to look at now that I have kids.

ABC's for God

Absolute power He holds in His Holy hands
Beautiful and mighty is His precious name
Celebrate for He has given us salvation
Dance for the heavenly reward is in sight
Eternity with my Holy Savior is my reward
Forgiveness has been granted for my sins
Given freedom by the Holy Lamb of God
Happy to be in the presence of His Holiness
Intrigued by the thought of eternity with Him
Jesus paid the price for all who believe
King of Kings, I shout for all to hear
Lord of Lords, the angels shout in return
Magnificent is the glory of His name
Nations bow down at His glorious feet
Offering praises to their Majestic King
Pouring their pleading hearts out to Him

Qualms and fears disappear with their faith
Righteousness they know they have found
Save me Lord! They all cry out desperately
Trust has been put in the omnipotent Savior
Understanding their need for a miracle
Victory can only be found in the Lord
Wondrous is the grace and mercy of God
X-alted rightfully above all else, worthy
You only, can they trust with their souls
Zealous for Your honor they have become

Now I know my ABC’s, Lord help me remember Thee



Thanks for reading. don't mind you sharing this, just ask before copying the poem. Copyrighted. Feel free to let me know what you think.

Tuesday, June 19, 2018

Macro Flowers

Played around with my macro lens that I have been ignoring for a while. Only my second time playing with this lens. Found some great pics. Hope you will check out more at my Group Tony Alexander Photography on Facebook. Feel free to join and peruse! Share this post if you like!

https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=oa.1542942005833741&type=3













Thanks for looking! Feel free to comment. I don't mind you using the images, just ask permission first. Thanks Again!

Monday, June 18, 2018

A Song for My Love


Most of my readers know by now that I am an author and photographer. Many will even know that I have been married to my high school sweetheart for over 11 years now. Little known fact though, is that I have been writing since I was 7 or 8. Back then it was stories. In high school I continued to write stories and began writing the book Kids on a Case: The Case of the Ten Grand Kidnapping, which I published while in college. In high school I began writing poetry, mostly out of boredom during class, as writing helped me focus. This is how I helped swoon the love of my life. The following poem is one of those written for her. I plan to compile these poems into a book that has been copyrighted and will be published at some point in the near future, so keep your eye out for that! I will be posting samples of the Copyrighted poems on my blog over the coming weeks, and I hope that you enjoy. Some are fun/silly, some are about love, some are about faith/hope, some are about struggles/dark times. I would encourage you to read these poems out loud, as that is how poems are meant to be enjoyed. So go ahead, find your serenity space, read it out loud, let the words surge through your veins. 

A Song for My Love
Where to go? What to do?
I feel so lost and so confused
I’ve never felt this way before
I’ve got butterflies and feel so dizzy

I should tell you how I feel
But when you’re around
I feel so short of breath
So torn up inside

The words I just can’t find
So let me tell you now
How I feel inside
For you need to know

When you’re not around
I just want to cry
For my heart aches so bad
I wish you’d never leave

So I could see your pretty face
And look into your lovely eyes
I wish I could tell you I love you
From the depths of my heart

That I’ll cherish you forever
Long into eternity
But the words evade my mouth
And for that my heart breaks

You deserve to hear those words
The words I love you
I want you, I need you
Without you I would fade away

I wish I could find the words
To tell you how I feel
My lovely sunshine
My beautiful rose

I hope this is enough
To make you see
Just how I feel
I love you



Thanks for reading! I look forward to your comments!

Saturday, June 16, 2018

Vancouver Scenery

Here is the last of the Vancouver posts. Lots more pics but yo can check them out at my Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/453437844784168/ Tony Alexander Photography. These are just some interesting scenery pictures.









Thanks for looking!

Friday, June 15, 2018

Panic from Within


Was really anxious this morning, and for those who do not suffer from anxiety, I figured I would give some insight into the world of anxiety and mental illness in general. Hope you enjoy my poem.

Panic from Within
A painful twisting knot pressing on my diaphragm
Tightening, gripping, tearing away my breath
A disabling disease, as my brain works against me
A cancer burning through every inch of my body
Stabbing
      Thieving
              Confident
                       Weakening
                                 Destructive
                                          Crippling
                                                  Deadly
Panic sweeps through my veins, muscles clench
Blackness clouds my vision, blurring the world
Spinning, losing control, fighting for my very breath
Drowning
        Gasping
               Fighting
                       Battling
Mind over body, anxiety pushing against reason
Confusion
         Doubt
               Senseless
Powerlessness ripping apart my very existence
I must not give in, reason rushes forward, slicing
Battling back these forces of darkness from within
Light dissipating the fog, casting away the clouds
Anger
     Frustration
                 Bitterness
Winding up its own power, defeating the powerlessness
A sunrise on the horizon, night gives way to none-other-than


Hope
     Faith
          Victory



Thursday, June 14, 2018

New Flower Pics

Here are some of my latest flower photos! Hope you all enjoy more to be found at Tony Alexander Photography on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/groups/453437844784168/












Thanks for looking! Feel free to let me know your thoughts in the comments, or check out more on Facebook. 

Wednesday, June 13, 2018

Vancouver Graffiti

Here is some pictures of graffiti art that I managed to take while in Vancouver. Always on the lookout for some cool tagging you know! Hoser is also featured in my book, Graffiti In Motion, which was awesome to see! Hoser is a great tagger.

See more graffiti and Vancouver pictures here, https://www.facebook.com/groups/453437844784168/






Thanks for looking! Feel free to comment or share this blog!

Monday, June 11, 2018

Vancouver Aquarium Photos and A Happy Reunion

Our day at the aquarium started of on a positive note, meeting my mother, whom I had not seen in many years, her hubby, whom I had never met, and my brother Devin, whom I also had not seen in years. We had a wonderful time exploring the Aquarium and then going out for a drive around Vancouver and then stopped at the Cactus Club. Sadly at the Cactus Club our waiter felt the need to spend more time flirting with a table 2 down from us. He completely ignored the guys at the table and only spoke with the women, rarely visiting any other table, we eventually had to go and ask for our bill, then had to wait even longer for him to stop flirting and come give us our bill, no tip for this guy.
Aside from that though, the day was a blast and we loved seeing Mom so happy. A pleasant reunion and the start of better days in our relationship!

Here is some photos, with more available at https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=oa.1532670250194250&type=3



























The last one is called "A Face Only A Mother Can Love".

Thanks for checking these out. Look for more of these to come.